‘Eminem is not very good, 50 cent is not very good, Snoop dog is not very good…’ In the band meeting following the performance, Murray criticises the boys for making too much noise and offers advice saying they can make noise but do it so that people can’t hear them. He also draws on his notes from the gig regarding the dissing – clearly not sure what this means, Jemaine tells him what dissing is and Murray’s alarmed as to why Bret would have anything to say against Snoopy. Following Murray’s critique, the boys launch into Hurt Feelings, a brilliant rap which describes occasions when the boys have had hurt feelings. The song’s full of lyrical gold. This has to be the highlight though: Jemaine also uses a pause to brilliant effect, which almost rivals the pause following the line, ‘They call me the Hiphopopotamus, my lyrics are bottomless’ from Hiphopopoyamus Vs. Rhymenoceros in series one. Following the song, Murray warns the boy of rapper’s hurting them back if they’re not careful. Dave also doesn’t help to comfort the boys, instead he tells them all about the grudge’s rapper’s hold, talking about an occasion where a rapper chopped someone’s body off, leaving the dick behind. Scary stuff! Whilst Bret is off recruiting gang members, Murray is being harassed by members of the Australian consulate. They taunt him about the mineral exports of New Zealand – ouch! Bret’s gang has their first meeting where they decide upon a timetable for guarding Bret against any attacks from rapper’s. Meanwhile, Mel accosts Jemaine and presents him with a lovely picture she has painted of him. It involves him wearing nothing apart from a pair of pants, looking rather muscular and holding the ‘Daddy guitar’ above his head. After being presented with Mel’s masterpiece, Jemaine’s gets ambushed by Bret’s gang upon entering the apartment. Just when he thinks the ambush is over, he’s attacked again. This time by Mr Lee, who’s hiding in a cupboard. At the band meeting the following day, Murray states that he’s received complaints about Bret’s gang and encourages him to break the gang up. Bret refuses, still convinced that he’s still at risk. Later on Mel finds her painting of Jemaine out in the street amongst rubbish. She confront Jemaine about this and in his defense Jemaine blames Bret, stating that Bret was jealous that she didn’t do a painting of him and ordered Jemaine to throw it out. Mel explains that she attempted a painting of Bret but the shadowing around the crotch got out of hand. Later, Jemaine joins Murray at a function at the Australian Embassy. They’re harassed and ridiculed by the Australians including the Australian Ambassador played by Alan Dale (of Neighbours, The OC, Lost and 24 fame). A reprise of Hurt Feelings follows, with numerous cast members including Murray, Mel, Doug, Gregg and Jemaine performing the song in a style that’s a take on the scene from Magnolia, where various cast members sing Wise Up. Later that evening, Jemaine returns home to find that Mel has returned the painting, which now includes Bret, but without the out of hand shadowing around the crotch. Jemaine, again, tries to get rid of the painting but is caught, again, by Mel. His excuse this time is that he’s taking it around the neighborhood to show people. Mel’s delighted at this and joins a rather uncomfortable looking Jemaine. Meanwhile, Bret and Jemaine are hiding out in the apartment and the police show up to question Bret. Dave jumps out of the window to avoid arrest, while Bret gets let off with a caution, as the police don’t like the kid. Dave ends up in hospital following the fall, which Murray uses to highlight the dangers of being in a gang. Dave quits the gang and Murray and Jemaine join after expressing their feelings at not being asked. Bret quits as Dave is no longer a member, as does Jemaine, leaving Murray as the last remaining member of The Tough Brets. Check out our review of episode 2 here.
