We’ve welcomed back Esther Dark this week, who has a few thoughts on not being okay. More to the point, on why admitting that we’re not all perfect is no bad thing. Over to the brilliant Esther, who’s been watching her Star Wars boxset, we suspect…! Role models are great, whether they are realistic or fantasy. However, it’s important to remember that we can’t always be superheroes. Having high expectations of ourselves can be draining. We persevere with solving our own problems and desperately try to fix and fight everyone else’s battles. But sometimes we need to recognise our weaknesses, take off the mask and stop pretending that we’re always perfectly okay when the reality is that we just aren’t. Sometimes it’s enough to just keep rolling on like BB-8 and recognise the times we need to wait for help.
Everyone has bad days
One in four of us will have a mental health problem in the course of a year. It’s not uncommon to have seasons of despair, loneliness or depression. Would you be ashamed of speaking out about a headache or a physical impairment? You shouldn’t feel embarrassed to speak about your mental health too.
You can’t fight everybody else’s battles
In Star Wars Episode II: Attack Of The Clones, Obi Wan Kenobi couldn’t fight all of Anakin’s battles. As his mentor, he had to take a step back so Anakin could learn to fight for himself, harness The Force in order to grow in power and become a defender of the galaxy (okay, maybe not the best example, as that didn’t end well…). But the point stands that we can’t take on everyone else’s problems, as much as we think we can. It’s good to be a listening ear and a helping hand to those we care about, but overstretching and burdening ourselves is not healthy for us or for those we seek to help.
You can’t always fly
Don’t you wish you could soar seamlessly through life, even better, race through it in one of Tatooine’s podracers? Life isn’t always an easy or straightforward journey that passes untroubled through starry galaxies. Sometimes there are uphill battles that need to be taken at a much slower pace. Be realistic and kind to yourself. Things might not be wonderful or amazing, and sometimes being okay with the journey and not the destination is the way forward. Finally, remember, it is okay to not be okay. If you’re suffering from a mental health problem or feel anxious, lonely, or depressed, don’t try to be a superhero. Seek support, and instead of repeating “I’m okay”, have a go at saying “I need help”. Thanks, as always, for reading. Esther Dark is a Digital Champion with the brilliant organisation YoungMinds. YoungMinds is the UK’s leading charity committed to improving the emotional wellbeing and mental health of children and young people.
