Cuba Gooding Jr stars as Ray, a seasoned fixer who botches a job and finds himself playing both sides in an organised crime turf war. Then one crime family (it doesn’t really matter which one, they’re fairly interchangeable) decides to bring in Dolph Lundgren and his collection of Hawaiian shirts to take out the other family and possibly Cuba Gooding Jr. That’s not where the Bourne comparisons end, either; the film adopts the same sombre attitude for any scene that doesn’t involve Dolph Lundgren, but without the talent to pull it off. There’s a lot of cod philosophy and biblical quotations thrown about to give it an air of grandeur, but then there’s also a scene where Dolph Lundgren fights off a load of henchmen whilst he wears only a towel – all of this scored to a swing record. It’s a heady mix, and one that jars with every transition. Dolph Lundgren plays the Wolf, a man so fierce that his reputation borders on mythical. They build him up to be the kind of person who can’t be found unless he wants to be. He’s a ghost, a fairy tale… and they have his mobile number. So that’s all right then. And here is a sentence I never thought I would say: Dolph Lundgren saves this film. Meanwhile, Cuba’s getting all philosophical about fate and watching a lady water her plants from doorways. In another Bourne parallel, it turns out that she is someone he feels he must protect in order to redeem himself. Unlike Bourne, who just turns up on the doorstep one day to say sorry, Cuba follows his charge around and keeps a whole photo collection of her, having watched her since she was a child. When she goes to kiss him later, it all gets very creepy and we’re supposed to think it’s a bit romantic. It’s not. For what is ostensibly an action thriller, the sequences take a long time to ramp up. The opening scenes, in which Cuba takes down several mobsters from afar in a high calibre gunfight, is nicely staged with swirling camera movements adding a kinetic energy to the proceedings. There is also a pretty good fight between Cuba and Dolph, limited only by the fact that moments are sped up to compensate for the fact that these aren’t two spring chickens going at it. The rest of it is largely Dolph or Cuba shooting men from a good distance who couldn’t hit a target if it was six feet wide and right in front of their face. The game is rigged and that’s never any fun to watch. A mixed bag then, this, but worth seeing for the sight of Dolph Lundgren in all his various costumes. If the film had embraced the ridiculousness of his early scenes and played everything with a more knowing sense of humour, One In The Chamber could have been the kind of amusing action film that goes well with pizza and beer. Alcohol is still a welcome accompaniment, but more to dull the disappointment. Follow our Twitter feed for faster news and bad jokes right here. And be our Facebook chum here.
