Said child was almost entirely on the money too. As we’ve reported before, Peppa Pig: The Golden Boots isn’t a Peppa Pig film. Instead, it’s an “experience”. If you’re one of those who treats anything described as an “experience” with a cautiously raised eyebrow, then we’re on your team. So let’s do the various assorted bits in turn. I’ve made the comparison before, but the Shaun The Sheep movie managed to get an 80 minute story together, without even needing dialogue. The Golden Boots is fine, but it’s basically two episodes mashed together. So, you get the first part where Mrs Duck robs said boots, and people chase her. To the moon at one point. I shit you not. Lest anyone ask ‘why do you write about Peppa Pig at Den Of Geek’, it’s science fiction for a start. Now: I like Peppa Pig. Genuinely. I took my 6-year old daughter to see this, and she thought it was okay. Notably though, it was the episodes we’ve long since had stored on our Sky+ box that got the biggest audience reaction. The individual episodes include the one where Miss Rabbit meets the Queen, the one where Useless Daddy Pig sets fire to something, the one where Useless Daddy Pig does something else, and the one where baby Alexander learns to say his first words. Which, surprisingly, weren’t “Daddy Pig, you’re such a tit”. The loudest reaction was for the one that takes place in snow, and I’ve got to say, the five individual episodes were well chosen. At least if the anklebiters of the Empire Cinema in Rubery were anything to go by. Anyway, these presenters did their best. It’s quite hard to generate audience interaction in pre-recorded material, but to their credit, they did get some mutterings of ‘Peppa’ when they asked the audience to shout out the pig’s name. Less successful were the moments where they tried to engage the grown-ups. We couldn’t hear the grown ups, they chastised us at one point. Damn straight you couldn’t. I was too busy working out how many Peppa Pig DVDs I could have got from the garden centre for the entry price of this charade. One thing of note: there’s clearly a tip of the hat to Marvel too, in that there’s a post-credits sting here. Don’t go expecting Nick Fury, though. Nope: it’s the same three presenters, trying to get me to dance again. Not a bloody chance. The low-rent nature of the generally enthusiastic links was brought home when the happy trio of sugar-filled grinners were joined by Peppa. Only they weren’t. There was no attempt to, Roger Rabbit-like (and that was decades again, remember), weave animation in with live action. Nope, they just hired someone to wear a big, furry Peppa Pig costume. Think Disneyland, but with a tenth of the budget. Presumably, so keen were all concerned to make as much money out of this venture as possible, that they promptly flogged the Peppa costume to Pontins as soon as the cameras were packed away. There is an upside to Peppa Pig: The Golden Boots, though. As a stepping stone to cinema for the very young, it’s a very easy place to start. You might not get the sense of wonder of a proper feature film, and I confess to still being dubious about the cash-in nature of the whole enterprise. But I did turn and look around at my fellow 10am patrons, and there was a whole bunch of people engaging with their kids, watching these mainly premium repeats. Not one of the parents was on their mobile phone, and it was a pretty full screening. That has to count for something, and it helps save Peppa Pig: The Golden Boots from one star. Yet this against Shaun The Sheep? Aardman bothered. The Peppa team pretty much just turned up. Follow our Twitter feed for faster news and bad jokes right here. And be our Facebook chum here.
