Spun from writer Ian Kennedy Martin’s successful one-off ITV drama, Regan, the show revolved around the title’s DI Jack Regan (John Thaw) and his partner DS George Carter (Dennis Waterman) of the Metropolitan Police’s Flying Squad. Running for four seasons between 1975 and 1978, The Sweeney was a huge hit with audiences, even spawning two well-regarded big-screen adventures in 1977 and 1978. Starring Ray Winstone as Regan and Ben ‘Plan B’ Drew as Carter, Sweeney 2012 opens strongly as we’re thrown into the middle of a late night Flying Squad raid in London’s Docklands. With its soaring Michael Mann-like score, minimalist production design and swooping aerial shots of London it’s clear that director Love is trying to say: this isn’t your father’s Sweeney. And for the first few minutes this approach works, with Drew’s George Carter leading the operation impressively and engaging in some nimble and effective action that has real bite and muscle. Unfortunately, all this good spade work is undone the moment Ray Winstone’s Regan is given his ‘iconic’ entrance, and it’s from this point on that the film takes a nosedive into cliché and parody from which it never recovers.  Despite its pulpy tone and highly formulaic structure, the original Sweeney at least had its feet planted in a recognisable version of reality. However, this update seems to take place in a netherworld of mockney gangster riffs, football hooligan chic and a fetishisation of American TV and movies that’s at odds with both the milieu and the film’s budget. Case in point is the film’s ‘reimagining’ of Jack Regan. Seemingly conceived as some sort of British Vic Mackey, instead Regan comes across as a hilarious fusion of Winstone’s ‘Raymondo’ character from his Bet365 adverts and The Fast Show’s Monkfish. The massive age difference between Regan and Carter here works against this dynamic developing and – despite some retrofitting that sets up Regan as a kind of surrogate father to Carter – you never really believe these two men are friends. And that, deep down in the DNA of the film, is the fundamental problem with The Sweeney. You just don’t buy it. While the original show was very much a product of its time and had a definite sense of place, this version manages to feel both out of touch with the period and lagging several years behind the broader streams of popular culture. The retro-copper schtick was dealt with far better in both Life On Mars and Ashes To Ashes, while even Guy Ritchie and Matthew Vaughan seemed to have twigged that the faux, low-budget hard-man theatrics of their early years have well and truly passed their sell by date. Although the action beats are mildly entertaining, they’re both highly derivative and lacking in scale. In particular a ‘centerpiece’ bank-raid-turned-shoot-out – set in an oddly deserted Trafalgar Square – plays like a dubiously low-budget remounting of the same sequence in Michael Mann’s Heat. Even a big chase set in a Gravesend caravan park (yes, really!), has echoes of Hot Fuzz’s model-village set denouement to it. However, despite the film’s failure, the notion of a remake of The Sweeney isn’t in itself a bad one. In fact, you need only watch the recent BBC series, The Line Of Duty to see that the world of dubious police practice is still fertile ground for drama and that – with the appropriate talent involved – this remake could well have worked. Unfortunately, the version we do get is sorely lacking in either. Follow our Twitter feed for faster news and bad jokes right here. And be our Facebook chum here.