Veep is a comedy of bad manners masquerading behind back-door, back-stabbing deals that pass as diplomacy. Veep is politics in a nutsack. Selina Meyer comes back to DC this week to make The Choice. The Choice is pro-choice or pro-life. The only thing Selina won’t do is speak “as a woman.” Unofficial polls have found that four out of five women hate women who speak “as a woman.” Selina’s not putting all her eggs in that basket. Meyer gets it right the first time when she simply declares “get the government out of my fucking snatch.” The sad thing is that if were to put it that simply, she might get the votes. The great thing is that none of her staff is actually ever on board. They lag constantly behind the loop, lost on the Beltway. Mike McLintock (Matt Walsh), enjoying a staycation honeymoon with Wendy, a DC journalist played by Kathy Najimi, running through a World War II marathon, is past the years when he could storm a hill. You get the feeling Mike could never storm a hill. He was born tired and worn out. He was old when he was first unwrapped. He’s a beat late when he shows up at the Veep’s think tank, offering up the same shit that Dan has already put up on the board. It is Mike who puts Jonah wise to the edible garbage at the Veep’s new office. Meyer’s personal assistant, Gary Walsh (Tony Hale), doesn’t want to be that guy in his forties carrying somebody else’s bag. He has ideas. He has input. He has fruit the size of embryos at various stages. Not very helpful. Worthless stuff. A waste of time. Take off his bag and Gary is useless. But he will be forever be invaluable to Selina Meyer. He is a masterful bagman. Everyone else is just a tote bag compared to him. Veep may be the most scatological show in TV history. Veep does for shit what Deadwood did for cocksucker. Dan Egan, played by Reid Scott, was hired as a shit and may be flushed on account of his shittiness. Dan Egan shat his way to the middle of the second-to-the-top of the DC dung heap and when he can’t hold it in any more he shits himself into a funky furlough. Jonah (Timothy Simons), who I called the skid mark of Veep last week, is now a cling-on. Dropped from the president’s staff, he is the turd that eludes the toilet paper. Jonah is a cyber-prick. Kevin Dunn’s Ben Cafferty could not possible give less of a shit for any of this. His I-don’t-give-a-shits are eloquent and dismissive, but ultimately lost, because he doesn’t give a shit. In a town full of shits, he doesn’t have one to give.  He is part of the don’t give a shit lobby, they’d have posters and buttons if they gave a shit, which they don’t. Yet, he’s probably the only person who could wave his transvaginal wand and make it go away. Sufe Bradshaw as Sue Wilson is as coolly efficient as a plunger. She is not one to leave the unflushable turd left from the person in the stall before you, Kent Davison (Gary Cole), swirling in circles. She will jiggle the handle until it goes down. Just not on her. Don’t get me wrong, I love this shit. Everything that is set up as any kind of fulfillment is ruined in this episode. Every dream dashed. Every copout copped to. Selina says she’ll say anything but “as a woman” and, of course, there it is front and center. Gary says he doesn’t want to be the guy carrying bags at forty and Selina coos that he has nothing to worry about; he’ll be carrying her bag forever. A very fulfilling episode. Den of Geek Rating: 4.5 Out of 5 Stars Like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter for all news updates related to the world of geek. And Google+, if that’s your thing!